10 Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Blame the Training

I was out walking a few months ago when I got chatting to someone in the park. Their dog had just hit the end of the lead and locked onto another dog in the distance. Not aggressive, but intense. The kind of behaviour that turns a walk into something you manage rather than enjoy. We exchanged a quick hello. A bit of small talk. Then the conversation shifted.

“He’s just not listening at the moment,” they said. “We’ve tried a few things, but nothing seems to stick. He’s just stubborn.”

I’ve heard that line more times than I can count.

We stood there for a few minutes and watched the dog. It struggled to settle even after the moment had passed. Still scanning. Still on edge.

So I asked a few questions. Not about recall. Not about lead work.

“How much sleep is he getting?”

“What’s he eating?”

“Where does he actually switch off during the day?”

“Do you use his meals for anything other than feeding?”

There was a pause.

The answers were honest. And fairly typical.

The dog was up late most evenings. Always around people. Always “on.” Fed from a bowl twice a day. Walks were the main outlet, but also the main battleground. We spoke for ten minutes and I made a few suggestions. Nothing complicated. Just a few adjustments around rest, structure, and how they were using food.

When I saw them again a couple of weeks later the difference in the dog was obvious. Not perfect. But calmer. More responsive. More able to disengage and listen.

No new tools. No complex techniques.

Just better foundations.

That is the uncomfortable truth about most dog training. Some problems are not training problems. They are lifestyle problems.

Before you blame the dog, the breed, the lead, the training method, or even yourself, it is worth taking a step back and asking a few bigger questions.

Behaviour does not exist in isolation.

The way your dog sleeps, eats, rests, plays, communicates, and lives day to day all shape how trainable, responsive, and emotionally balanced they are.

And in many cases, improving those foundations changes far more than people expect.

1. Does your dog have somewhere it can properly switch off?

This is one of the biggest things I look at before I start working with any dog.

Where does the dog actually rest? Not where does it lie down occasionally. Where does it properly switch off?

A surprising number of dogs never truly relax.

They follow people from room to room. They react to every sound in the house. They stay half-alert all day long, waiting for the next thing to happen.

Owners often interpret this as affection or loyalty. Sometimes it is. But often it is also overstimulation.

An over-aroused dog struggles to regulate emotions, process information, and make good decisions.

This is one reason I have become a huge fan of crates and x-pens.

I was not always that way.

When I started, I viewed crates the same way many owners do now. Restrictive. Unnecessary. Maybe even a little unfair.

Then I saw what happened when dogs were properly introduced to them. The crate stopped being a cage and became something else entirely. A bedroom. A decompression zone. A place where the nervous system could finally calm down. A place where the dog wants to be.

That matters. Dogs learn during downtime. They process experiences during rest. They recover emotionally during rest. They become more capable of listening and engaging when they are not permanently operating at a heightened state.

The irony is that many “high energy” dogs are actually exhausted dogs. Owners keep adding stimulation because the dog seems restless. More walks. More play. More excitement.

But what the dog often needs is better quality rest.

What to try

• Introduce a crate or x-pen gradually and positively

• Use it after walks, training sessions, and exciting events

• Give your dog time to decompress without constant interaction

• Stop feeling guilty for allowing your dog to properly rest

Sometimes the best thing you can do for a dog is absolutely nothing.

2. Are you feeding your dog well?

Diet conversations can become strangely emotional. People get attached to brands. Advertising is powerful. Packaging is convincing. But the reality is that a lot of commercial dog food is not particularly good.

Many big-brand foods are built around cost efficiency and shelf stability rather than optimal canine nutrition. Heavy fillers. Large amounts of grain. Lower quality ingredients. Clever marketing.

And while I am not interested in turning this into a nutrition war, I do think owners should ask harder questions about what they are feeding.

Because food affects more than physical health. It affects energy levels, digestion, skin, coat condition, motivation, and sometimes behaviour. And yes, I think many dental products are massively oversold. The idea that a heavily processed stick somehow compensates for poor nutrition and lack of proper chewing opportunities has always struck me as optimistic.

What should owners look for instead?

Higher meat content is a good start. Less unnecessary filler. Better ingredient quality. Raw feeding, in my view, is often the gold standard when done properly. That does not mean it is practical for everybody. It can be expensive, messy, time-consuming, and less convenient for training.

But owners should at least understand what good nutrition looks like so they can make better decisions.

No food fixes bad training. But poor nutrition can absolutely make everything harder.

3. Are you using your dog’s food to build engagement?

This builds directly on the previous point.

One of the easiest mistakes owners make is separating feeding from training completely.

The dog eats breakfast from a bowl.The dog eats dinner from a bowl.Then owners wonder why the dog has limited interest in working for food outside.

Motivation matters. A dog that has free access to food with no expectation of engagement has less reason to value interaction with the owner. That does not mean starving the dog or creating unhealthy relationships around food.

It means being smarter.

I use food constantly in training. Not because I want dogs dependent on treats forever, but because food is a powerful communication tool. Hand feeding can improve focus.It can build engagement.It can create optimism around learning.

It also slows owners down and makes feeding more purposeful.

That alone can improve training.

What to try

• Use part of your dog’s daily food allowance during training

• Reward eye contact and voluntary engagement

• Hand feed during foundational work

• Stop thinking of meals and training as separate things

Small changes here can make a very big difference.

4. Is everyone in your home speaking the same language?

Consistency matters. But not just consistency from one day to the next.

Consistency between people.

One owner says “down.”

Another says “get down.”

A third says “sit down.”

To humans, these all feel related.

To dogs, they are different sounds attached to potentially different meanings. The same confusion happens around boundaries. One person allows jumping. Another discourages it. One rewards barking by giving attention. Another gets frustrated by it.

Dogs thrive on clarity. The clearer the picture, the faster learning happens. This is one reason progress often accelerates when an entire household gets aligned. The dog stops trying to guess which rules apply today.

What to try

• Agree on command words as a family

• Keep commands short and consistent

• Make sure everybody understands what behaviours are expected

• Avoid creating multiple words for the same behaviour

Clarity reduces frustration for both dog and owner.

5. Does your tone match your intent?

Dogs pay attention to far more than words. They react to tone, posture, movement, confidence, and emotional state.

Owners sometimes give commands that sound more like negotiations.

“Buddy… sit? Sit? Come on… sit?”

The dog hears uncertainty. That does not mean owners should shout or intimidate. Quite the opposite. Good handlers are usually calm. But they are also clear. There is structure in the way they communicate.

I often ask owners to think about a teacher or family member they genuinely liked growing up. Somebody fair. Maybe funny. Maybe warm. But not somebody you ignored or were willing to upset. There was steel there. Not aggression. Not fear. Not intimidation.

Just quiet certainty. And you respected that.

Dogs respond surprisingly well to that kind of communication.

What to try

• Give commands once and clearly

• Avoid nervous repetition

• Slow your movements down

• Speak like you expect the behaviour to happen

Confidence changes how dogs respond.

6. What behaviours is your dog rehearsing every day?

Dogs become good at what they practise.

That sounds obvious, but owners often underestimate how powerful rehearsal really is. If your dog spends two hours a day barking at the front window, it is rehearsing arousal. If your dog drags you down the street every walk, it is rehearsing pulling. If your dog ignores recall repeatedly at the park, it is rehearsing ignoring you.

Training sessions alone cannot compete with constant repetition of unwanted behaviour. This is where management becomes important. And management is not a dirty word. Every good trainer uses it. Blocking windows. Using leads strategically - indoors and outside. Avoiding overwhelming environments. Controlling access to certain situations.

That all matters.

But management is not training. Management prevents rehearsal. Training changes behaviour. Those are related but different things. The problem is that management alone is fragile. A dog that only behaves because conditions are tightly controlled is one mistake away from failure. That is why management should create space for training, not replace it.

What to try

• Identify what behaviours your dog rehearses daily

• Reduce opportunities for unwanted rehearsal

• Use that breathing room to teach alternative behaviours

The less chaos your dog practises, the easier progress becomes.

7. Are you trying to teach difficult skills in difficult environments?

There is a strange tendency in dog training to jump straight into the hardest possible version of a problem. Owners try to practise recall in busy parks. Loose lead walking on crowded streets. Neutrality around high distraction dogs. And when it fails, they assume the dog is stubborn.

But context matters.

A dog that can focus beautifully in the kitchen may struggle completely in an exciting environment. That is normal. Dogs do not generalise well automatically. Skills need to be built progressively.

At home. Then the garden. Then quieter outdoor environments. Then more distracting spaces.

There absolutely is a place for real-world training - this is one of the foundations of Much Ado About Dogs.

Eventually the dog must perform in the environments that matter. But trying to start there usually slows everything down.

What to try

• Build new skills somewhere calm first

• Increase distraction gradually

• Stop expecting the dog to succeed in environments it is not ready for

This is what smart training looks like

8. Are you over-focusing on the bad moments?

This is something I see all the time. Owners become so focused on failures that they stop noticing progress. The dog barked once, so the entire walk feels ruined.The recall failed once, so the whole session feels pointless.

But behaviour change is rarely linear.

Good days. Bad days. Moments of regression. Moments of breakthrough. That is normal.

What matters is trajectory.

Where are you compared to where you started? Is the dog calmer than a month ago? More responsive than before? Recovering faster? Checking in more often?

Those things matter.

Owners who can recognise positive trajectory tend to stay more consistent.

And consistency is usually what produces long-term results.

What to try

• Track small improvements

• Stop expecting perfection overnight

• Judge progress over weeks, not isolated moments

Training is rarely about instant transformation. It is about direction.

9. Are you actually fulfilling your dog?

Dogs are not generic. Breed matters. Drive matters. Genetics matter.

A working-bred spaniel, a livestock guardian breed, and a toy companion dog are not starting from the same place.

Yet owners sometimes expect all dogs to behave as if they are.

Many behaviour problems are really outlet problems. The dog has energy, drive, curiosity, prey instinct, or social needs with nowhere appropriate for them to go. And if those needs are not met constructively, they usually emerge destructively.

That does not mean every dog needs hours of exercise. In fact, endlessly increasing physical exercise often creates fitter, harder-to-switch-off dogs. Fulfilment is broader than exhaustion.

Structured play. Problem solving. Training games. Scentwork. Tug. Chasing. Searching. Carrying.

The right activities depend on the dog in front of you.

What to try

• Think about what your dog was bred to do

• Build appropriate outlets into daily life

• Use play and engagement intentionally

A fulfilled dog is usually easier to live with.

10. Are you putting the work in consistently?

This is the difficult one - but it is so often the root cause of many issues.

Most owners love their dogs. But love and consistency are not always the same thing.

I can usually tell fairly quickly which owners are likely to make progress - after maybe 5 mins, 10 on a bad day!

It is not about experience. Not about confidence. Not about having the “perfect” dog. It is about accountability and how comfortable people are with it.

Do they apply the training consistently? Do they pay attention to detail? Do they keep going when progress slows slightly? Do care enough about the output?

Or do they drift back into old habits the moment things improve?

Dogs are incredibly fair in this regard. They reflect repetition. If boundaries are clear consistently, behaviour improves. If training happens consistently, communication improves. If structure exists consistently, decision-making improves.

Owners often look for the perfect technique when what they really need is more consistency around the basics.

What to try

• Focus on repeatable habits rather than dramatic breakthroughs

• Accept that good training can sometimes feel repetitive

• Understand that progress usually comes from accumulation, not magic moments

Simple done consistently beats complicated done occasionally.

Final Thoughts

Most owners are not failing because they do not care.

They are struggling because they are focusing on the visible problem rather than the systems underneath it.

Behaviour is shaped by lifestyle.

Sleep.

Diet.

Routine.

Communication.

Fulfilment.

Environment.

Consistency.

Fixing those things does not solve every problem instantly. But it usually makes training clearer, calmer, and far more effective. And very often, that is the difference between feeling permanently stuck and finally moving forward.

Dog training is not really about controlling dogs.

At its best, it is about creating clarity.

Clear communication.

Clear expectations.

Clear routines.

Clear boundaries.

Dogs thrive when life becomes easier to understand.

And if you can give them that, you are already much further ahead than you probably realise.